Bad Rap For The Middle East

The Truth About Child Brides (cont)

Laura Bush recently praised Jordan for its efforts in new media fields. “Through partnerships between Jordanian and U.S. technology firms, Jordan is ensuring that all children will have the skills they need to be part of the IT revolution and find jobs in the marketplace. It is remarkable that the Kingdom has achieved a 90 percent literacy rate.

“Education can help children see beyond a world of hate and hopelessness to one of unlimited opportunity. Education benefits all and should be available to all,” she said, noting that two-thirds of the world's 800 million illiterates are women. Because of their high literacy rates, more Jordanian women are seeking careers first and Jordan consistently has one of the lowest rates of teenage marriages.”

United Nations: With the power of celebrity spokesper son Nicole Kidman, the United Nations Development Fund for Women launched a worldwide campaign against gender violence, with a brand new anti-violence website. Worldwide, one in three women will experience violence in their lifetimes. “The violence starts very young, and it mutes the voice of these innocents, making them susceptible to being sold off into marriage or continuing the cycle of cruelty that many women experience throughout the world,” says the actress.

For our poor Ethiopian friend Afework, it’s little consolation that help is on the way. But others have been saved from the horror of lost childhood by the increased vigilance. In Bahrain, law enforcement is using provisions in its penal code adopted from the UN Convention on Transnational Crime, and the Optional Protocol on the Rights of the Child to prosecute human traffickers and tribal leaders who solicit child brides.

Lamya Atif, an underground leader in the fight against child brides in the Gulf, says more countries need to be like Bahrain and Oman, “Too soon, childhood for these girls will be over. As wives, their destiny will be years and years of household labor and childrearing. The chance to go to school will vanish. It's a hard life; half to two-thirds of child brides are beaten by their in-laws.”

In October, Atif worked closely with authorities in Bahrain to break up several ceremonies where men—in each case over 45—were set to marry girls under 12 years old. “Sometimes a girl is not ‘taken’ sexually. She may not even see her husband until she is a teenager or until she transitions into puberty. She’ll be given to her in-laws who will make her perform the house duties and be prepped for life as a wife. If the duties are not performed to the family’s liking, the mother-in-law may beat her with sticks or pots.”

She recalls the last ceremony. “There was such a commotion in the bridal room,” she says. “The groom’s family had come to inspect the bride. Though she was all of nine years old and still with her baby fat, they didn’t like her dress or the way she looked. ‘You don't look beautiful, you are ugly!’ they screamed. There was a negotiation that the dowry would be less, and this family was crowding her with a menacing intent.”

It was then that she sent a message via Bluetooth to authorities waiting nearby to raid the rogue ceremony. “My heart was very sad,” she says. “What is a nine year old supposed to do? She was trying to help her family live better. The dowry would have made life easier for her uneducated family. She didn’t know what would await her in marriage. All she thought was that she was unattractive.”

Authorities arrived, mid-argument and took the would-be groom for prosecution, for which the maximum penalty could be one year in jail. “Since the marriage did not actually take place, he cannot be charged with the maximum penalties. At least we saved her, and without the support of law enforcement, there would have been nothing we could have done except watch another innocent life flitter away,” says Atif.

Protection for authorities and social workers who break up marriages is vital. In many countries—with dozens of prosecuted cases reported in India, Pakistan and Thailand—it is the protector that is targeted for vengeance. “Machete attacks on social workers in their homes are quite common. However, when word gets out the government is supporting those who break up these underage marriages, you see an almost immediate decline,” Atif reports.

Betrothals have been common practice since the beginning of civilization, and underage marriage has been practiced just as long. Why the epidemic urgency to stop it now? Why are there so many health problems now associated with child brides?

"This is a big, tough, complicated issue," concedes Abebe Kebede, an Ethiopian social worker. “It hasn't been highlighted that much because marriage is viewed positively in almost every culture, no matter the age," he says. "The most wicked toll centers on health since early pregnancies are the leading cause of death for girls age 15 to 19 in the developing world.”

According to the United Nations, at least two million women are currently living with gruesome vaginal and anal ruptures— called fistulas—that result from bearing children too young. Untreated fistulas can be fatal, and survivors are typically left incontinent for life.

“The phenomenon of child brides is put in the spotlight even more because of the proliferation of new media,” Kebede says. “Sexuality used to be protected more. It was private. You had to go out of the way to experience it and to visualize it. But more an more you see it on television, magazines and videos. These are everywhere and poverty is not a barrier to watching.

Where Does That Leave Us?

Silence is no longer an option. We must get our message out to those who marry off female children and put them in hell: Send your daughters to school! Give girls all over the world an opportunity to succeed in their lives. Eradicate the child bride question once and for all.

What can you do to help?

We can all make a big difference just by educating ourselves about this insidious problem and speaking out against it.

Advocates for Youth
Ph: 202/419-3420
www.advocatesforyouth.org
Mission: Dedicated to creating programs and advocating for policies that help young people make informed and responsible decisions about their reproductive and sexual health. Advocates provides information, training and strategic assistance to youth-serving organizations, policy makers, youth activists and the media in the United States and the developing world.

International Center for Research on Women
Ph: 202/797-0007
www.icrw.org
Mission: ICRW seeks to promote a world free of poverty in which women and men, girls and boys have equal opportunities to achieve their potentials and realize their rights.

The HOPE Organization
Ph: 435/627-9582
www.childbrides.org
Mission: Dedicated to assisting survivors of abuse within polygamous relationships and underage marriage on their courageous journey to personal freedom. Offers support, protection, assistance, choices, opportunities and hope for the women and young adults (both males and females) who have been kicked out or have chosen to leave this culture.

 

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